Boring Boring Bebop
by susanboy
Summary: The bebop crew runs out of gas...with hilarious results.Ed gets kidnapped!!!With hilarios results.Please R


I don't own Bill gates, the ferrets, or any of the crew, nor the giant evil robot, nor the two ferret killers.  
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Once upon a time, in New York City in 1941... at this club open to all comers of play, night after night, at a club named "Minstons Play House" in Harlem, they play jazz sessions competing with each other. Young jazz men with a new sense are gathering. At last they create a new genre itself. They are sick and tired of the conventional fixed style jazz. They're eager to play jazz more freely as they wish ... in 2072 in the universe... The bounty hunter are gathering in the spaceship "BEBOP," will play freely without fear of risky things. They must creat new dreams and films by breaking traditional styles. The work, which becomes a genre itself, will be called...COWBOY BEBOP. And this is a tale of one of their many adventures...  
  
"Hey, spike, we're out of gas" the woman said. "What do ya want Faye" Spike replied. "We're out of gas" Faye replied bleakly. "Oh, we're out of gas. We're out of gas. We're out of gas, we've been out of gas for three hours!" Spike replied sharply. "oh come on, it's 2071, and we don't have a food mater trasported....thingy. Spike, you shouldn't be so testy, you knowyour blood pressure, it could hurt you, you know." Faye said, not phased by his words one bit. "Testy, now there's a funny word!" Ed cut in. They had picked up Ed, looking for a bounty on a hacker. Ed, while only eight years of age, was a wonderful hacker, and could get any program opened up in a few minutes. "Ed, I wonder about you sometimes" Said jet, just walking in from tending to his bonsais, his favorite plants, and friends. "Hey guys, We got water, lots of water, I found it while talking about stuff in my virtual journal!" Jet said excitedly. "I don't see why you keep that stupid diary, kinda girlish. Jet, I don't see why I joined this. Wait, yes I do. because I didn't expect to have to live on this ship with a freak eight year old, a woman with a bad attitude, and a horrible cook, You. I've been eating belpeppers and beef, minus the beef, for a month. A month! I just need a change, Any change at all, something anything. Day in, day out, same thing. Go for bounty, find freak, shoot miss, come here, plan, go find freak, shoot, hit, and then find out I don't get the stupid bounty. Genetic changes, deadly bombs, freaks, hackers, people with a piercing everywhere, and where there isn't tattoos, gambling, evil corporations, possessed animals, killer robots, and horrors of space. I can't move, breath, without finding some weirdo, and another thing..." Spike ranted. Spike ranted for about an hour, until Faye said, "Spike! We all stopped listening half an hour ago! Jet went to drink some of his water. What we need is gas." "No really, gas. I'd never guess! Or we could use Jet's magic water to fuel the ship." Spike said, then laughed. He laughed and laughed and just kept going on. then, for an odd reason, Faye and Ed joined in. The went on for an hour until a thump was hears, and there saw jet at the door. He was bloated up, looking like he was ready to burst, then, a few words came out of his mouth. They were "Guys... I think....I'm...Retaining....Water." After that, an odd blue glow came from his body, then, blue fire erupted from him. It filled the room, not burning a thing, but instead scared everyone out of their wits. Then jet fell down, about an hour later he arose and said "I am the horrible water demon that has taken over your friends body, now we will determine the fate of the multi-verse!" Jet/demon yelled out. Spike just then woke up from a wonderful nap and said "evil water demon multi-whataverse?" he groggily said just then, the evil water demon jumped up, floated in the air for about five seconds, looked around, and attacked Spike. Spike, being Spike, had to attack back.  
  
The fight went on and on, for what seemed hours. First Spike was winning, then he wasn't, then he was then he wasn't. Spike had no natural way to beat the demon himself He jumped up, and bashed a button on the wall. Then he hit the ground. He wasn't dead but tired. Before he hit the ground, he yelled to his crew "Grab on to something bolted down!". The water demon said" You think you won, but I have. Your button does nothing and..." he flew out of the ship, and yelled" I'll be back, and I'll take your little dog too!" Spike smiled, and said "Dog? We don't got no stinkin dog," then he closed the air lock, and stood up. Then he said "Oh my deity, I killed Jet!" Faye said "You...well bad bad person." Just then there was a thump on the door. They opened it, and saw jets body. "You killed jet, now he will haunt you forever. For ever and ever and ever. Your doomed you know, doomed and you have no chance to live. Oh please, brave and noble Jet, spare me. Instead, you may have this child. She is young, and full of life, and will be a more suitable host body for you to seek your revenge in!"Faye said, and help up Ed in an attempt to save herself. Just then, Jet fell to the floor, and they saw the real dead person, but not a ghost. It was Spikes old lover Julia."Oh My, it's Julia, your dead lover. She has come to seek revenge on you, you are doomed you know, doomed doomed. She will haunt you forever, because you never saved her, and left her to die. Oh ghost, please take this host child, and spare me of your wrath" Faye said, and still help up Ed in an attempt to save her own life. Again, the body fell to the floor, and it was Viscous, Spikes rival, and very alive." Oh I'm so glad to see you, our ships out of gas, and we need help, will you let us come on your ship?" Spike yelled. "Yes, yes I will, but only if you fight me!" Viscous Yelled at him. Normally, Spike would, but no tonight. Instead, he took the living Jet in his arms, gave Viscous some money, and stepped into his ship. Ed said out of the blue "Testy is a funny word ya know. It means something else, but sounds like testi..." and Faye threw her out of the ship. Normally, in thirty seconds, she would be dead. But at second twenty-nine, an odd ship picked her up. It was large and silver, and it just floated there. The next thin that was said was said by Spike, it was "OK, rescue mission, take your stuff and let's get out of he-ya"  
  
Unknown to the crew, there was great evil on the ship. But soon enough, they would learn of it. It was the evil of evils. You could hear him in his lair, plotting and scheming "I will destroy the intruders, but first I will toy with them. Now to laugh!" That is what he did. it was maniacal too "Even though my cat, Mr. Giggles destroyed by real body, this robot body is much better, that's why I fired my secret weapon, and it was a money saving idea also." Back to our heroes...  
  
The inside was like the outside. Shiny. They opened a door, and inside they saw something frightful. They saw a giant robot. With guns for arms, shoulders, and knees it was a sight to see. They stood there for second, minutes that seemed like hours. Then Fay blurted out "It would be scarier if it had arms, don't you think so?" Viscous, Jet, and Spike blushed, and they moved on. The next room was worst. It was full of Ferrets. Living ones too. They could take on one, ten, maybe a hundred, but not this uncountable amount They thought they were doomed, when to robots fell out of the ceiling, and said," I am the pusher robot" on said "I am the shover robot" the second said. Then the first said" I push people down stairs, do not trust the pusher robot, he is outdated" The other said "I am the shover robot, I shove people down stairs. Do not trust the pusher robot, he is outdated. And they turned towards the ferrets.  
  
The robots got done with the ferrets, in seconds with their plasma guns, and turned around. They said your welcome, and flew off. The crew would never know where they came from, no one does. They just come when people are in need. The group continued down what was called a maze. It was really a hallway, but the evil guy didn't know that. And to the evil guy... "They are further then I though they would get, but I. Bill Gates, will destroy them now!" Too bad for him, the group heard the Bill Gates Part, and rushed in the door.  
  
: Gates, the jig is up! Give us the girl and I might not kill you!" Spike ran in, gun pointed. But Gates was gone. When he released he was heard, he flew out the window. Just then, Faye opened a chest and yelled "Look, a billion dollars, we'll never eat just belpeppers again!" At that moment, Ed popped out of Spikes backpack and said "Good Nap, let's go back to the ship!" And that's what they did. When they got back, the Spike said "Ed, I don't know how you got in there, and if I find out, I think I'll die. I'm going to eat, go to sleep." But Ed was already asleep. That night, spike had just belpeppers, and you know what? He enjoyed it.  
  
  
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And that is the end of the delightful romp, Boring Boring Bebop 


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